These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
