Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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