dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I am puke
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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