We're like a lot better than the average bears
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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