There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
