We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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