Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Sober January is a disaster.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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