Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
