we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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