I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
