Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
