i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
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Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
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I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
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