Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
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