somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Randomize
