I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Randomize
