He disabled his match.com account in front of me
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
