Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
We are all done wearing pants today
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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