I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
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