He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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