I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Randomize
