It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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