$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Randomize
