I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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