Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize