as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
