She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Randomize
