I must be too annoying 4 u.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize
