You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
