can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
