i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
