do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
