glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
