I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
