Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
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