He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
