I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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