A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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