do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Randomize
