I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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