You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Randomize
