my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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