I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Randomize
