So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize
