i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
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