i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
