I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Randomize
