u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Randomize