If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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