he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize