i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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