wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
that's an acceptable place to lick
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Don't EVER smell your tampon
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Randomize