Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
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It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
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Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis